if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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