btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
