I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
