The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
