Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
