hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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