Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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