I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
