dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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