So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize