You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
