Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I need a beard to bite.
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