If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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