At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
