no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
