I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
That accounts for only three of the penises
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
