But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
