I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
