some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
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