note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
