when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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