Christians are straight up FREAKS
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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