I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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