butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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