Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize