i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
