Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.

Fav 69 933 4975
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(240): View more from Maryland

This kid is drunk.

(410): View more from Maryland

I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.

Fav 6 8347 1330
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(303): View more from Colorado

It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.

Fav 22 8925 1836
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(607): View more from New York

Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.

Fav 12 2108 6354
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(615): View more from Tennessee

At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...

Fav 11 3622 1396
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(301): View more from Maryland

I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS

Fav 8 3119 1287
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(773): View more from Illinois

Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well

Fav 4 749 1449
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(864): View more from South Carolina

Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.

Fav 1 322 500
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(541): View more from Oregon

eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!

Fav 0 36 6
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