sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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