Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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