We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
