I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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