I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
