i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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