Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
