Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
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