One girl and one boy is just not enough.
People in love make me want to vomit
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
