Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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