just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
