there was a trapeze. enough said
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
