you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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