I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
