i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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