I'm going to jail i love you
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
the day after is always just damage control
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
we're so committed to being not committed
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
