Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Randomize
