No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize