I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
