We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
