Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
