Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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