I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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