I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize